Story of my life, or lack of it. So much drama I can't even prioritize what to deal with first. I know I'm supposed to say "I have no time for your personal shit" but lately, it seems impossible. It scares me that I can't tell the truth from the drama anymore but it scares me more that it could really just be my fault. As usual. We're fighting a losing battle, but we're fighting anyway. And at the same time, these voices in my head they speak of nothing but the past. I guess this means I.. hate you? No, I don't and it kills me. It just kills me that it doesn't, it doesn't kill you at all. Fuck you and your fucking existence. I just realized all this while, I haven't been back to my old life and now that I am really truly plunged in it, it doesn't feel familiar at all. Not anymore. Still, I refuse to believe that I am beneath this. I will fucking fight for my sanity this time, even if it is only within myself. The chess board I have long abandoned displayed before me but it's just a mirror image, because it is truly the only thing I have left. We lied,
We can't go on
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