That had ever hurt out feelings

Tastes like fresh air. Grass, smokes, chicken, wine, bottled beers and scary trees. Familiarity, comfort and a strange buzzing. Salvation is a little out of the reach at the moment, but that's a different story altogether. Unengaged = Thanks for fucking telling me. Tolling weekend; petty arguments, over-exaggerations and tense silence. Yes, no, maybe, I don't know. Tick tock tick tock. And as we spiraled down down down, all there really is to say is that MJ should have died in his prime. *cough cough sniff sniff. (Swine flu will kill us all) And somehow I am still wondering if I'm in this as much as I should be. So we're just missing another name, another label right. Convention was never our cup of tea, or mine anyway. And the more I think about or remember how suffocating it is (via parallel universes all across my social network), the closer the walls seem to close on me. Zoom zoom doom. Though I can now cross out the only thing on my before-we-leave list. I love Frolick. HEEHEE. And with no more money to hide behind, I can no longer pretend that they are both equally emotionally taxing. Doom.

How do I say I'm sorry

Cos the words are never gonna come out, now.

One for all

No one cares about the storm until it hits.

Jumping down your throat

Since when has this ever been suffice?

Tell me you love me

Every time I walk through a door I am hit in the face with false accusations and snide remarks. And for the millionth time, I am left reeling and feeling significantly alone and somewhat neglected as time catapults us into different vortexes. Everyone seems to be hidden behind some kind of shield, though I must admit that the one I have been painted as is probably all. It's too easy to become complacent or well.. lazy in anything from grades to life. Poison and slip-ups. It's funny that oversensitivity doesn't work two-ways on one person. Hawhaw. I forgot that once money is wrangled in and around you get stuck in it's tightening webs for however long it substantiates with nothing to cut through them but time I might not have. Not to mention greatly depreciate my already-declining value and level of importance to said person. Funny that I spared one but neglected the one I am living in now. Lazy in showing importance, lazy in basic manners, lazy in compassion and patience. I have been bombarded with nothing but angst and heated replies throughout the storm brewing over me, instead of the shelter once provided by our quaint connection. I guess this and everything else was just evaporating slowing to form this cloud I still carry around. 

Running in circles, chasing our tails

I'll chase you down until you love me

I feel like we completely forgot the concept of "for now". School begins again for yet another incredibly trying term and I can already foresee how it's going to be seeing as I am up the night before rushing BMR. Strange and somewhat quiet weekend filled with tense silences and miscommunications. So you should take care of yourself... to take care of you.. IT'S NOT MY FAULT YOU MUMBLE! Hahaha. It's okay, I slur a lot so we're kinda even. For a tiny moment, all the threats became empty as my eyes raised and heart sank and time froze and all that other cliched nonsense happened. Hawhaw. Though I must admit it is slowly becoming too difficult to deny the anger and strain on either sides and.. See. I am forgetting what used to be the only thing keeping my sanity. Nowadays, what with the enormous emotional shift around me, it's harder not to have apprehension boiling inside me. And yet I am still in this bubble where nothing feels real, like aftershock except without a quake.. to me anyway. Like everything is just a wallet away. Or a bitchy mcbitch bitch trip to Frolick. It's getting progressively easy to sleep things off, so I'm either immune to it or... what? Hmm. On the other hand, nostalgia kicks in so bad that.. they bully me on Facebook): Hahaha. I am glad for what I have gained and lost.

Sounds of laughter, shades of life

I don't know why you're here

"So you should take care of yourself."

They slip away across the universe

Pools of sorrow,

Waves of joy.

While we froze down below

I won't even know where to begin. Rebellion takes the stakes this weekend. Well that and vodka. Close call. Asshole-ism.. alcoholism.. Same difference. Suddenly I found myself backtracking to way back when when I was even more head-strong than I am now. At least I didn't leave. Hurhur. I am an asshole.. but I didn't start it!): Okay fine I did. I'm terrible. And clearly allergic to large doses of vodka. Heehee. Sorry baby love you foreverzz. Hahaha. Saturday night was like tables turned and let's just say I prefer being out. Heehee. Clearly I have decided not to take anything this weekend too seriously. The only thing that saddens me is the grave difference in all of us and the distance we have carved for ourselves between ourselves. But I suppose it comes with time and space and I'll keep whatever I still have left. Oh and apparently I now have a signal phrase for when I'm high. Hawhaw.

We're covered in lies but that's okay