you would never

Yesterday in a state of epic confusion, I made my way to our old stomping grounds in the scorching afternoon heat. I don't know what I was thinking or where you would be on a Tuesday afternoon. I didn't find you so I walked everywhere to make myself seen so that somewhere somehow maybe someone would tell you that they saw me and how lost I looked. "It seemed like she was looking for you" they would tell you. And maybe you would somehow know that I was lost and that I needed you. I don't know what I would have done if we did meet. I just know that merely being around you would somehow help me understand what I am going through. I miss you.