in your room, in my room

This last week begun with the extremely scary realization that I only had about 3.5 weeks left actually in Singapore before I am unwillingly whisked away to my great.. adventure? Hurhur. The last few days have seen me more calm, save for what I can only assume is PMS. This notion of being a "good person" is something that continues to puzzle me, especially since the bar just keeps getting set lower and lower. Things that may have helped: accept, deny or apologize. Things he did: pretending nothing happened, stalking, sitting down. What a fucking dumbass. Seriously though, ain't nobody got time for that. Moving on. The Singapore food trail has begun and now I am fat again ): Every morning I wake up praying for the disease because well, this really is the worst possible time to be late. Hurhur. Spent a lot of quality time with the girls this week not sitting around talking about our problems (boys) but having fun, bitching about everything and pretty much getting raped on (single) ladies night. I don't know what it is about my life that attracts such ridiculous drama ie why are you guize such bitches. Why cannot. Saturday night pretty much began in the smoking room, slurring words of adoration about a boy who has always been, and unfortunately will always be, the love of my life. Much later when I pushed those thoughts out of my heavy head and when the champagne kicked in and thy appeared out of nowhere, it was like yeah sure why not. Is it weird that I don't even feel anything anymore? Perhaps it's because I expected it to happen from when she first left. Also I am actually surprised at just how much of a douchebag I actually am, wearing my wrist ache like a motherfucking prize. Idiot. It's also quite amazing to see the progress of my emotional healing from the last few times this happened, that is something I am truly proud of. And as much as there is still a gap in things between us, I still feel really comfortable because everything is strangely friendly. Right now, I'm okay.


who do boys like they're girls
who do girls like they're boys