So there goes the bubble. Reality hitting in the form of "Okay fine, I don't really know what I'm doing" leaping out of my mouth. Oops. Well, saw this coming. I see everything coming, yet I never get myself out of anything. Self-destruct. Oh poor little rich girl. Pfft. Girls will be girls I guess. For once, I'm actually quite used to it. No one really gives you a chance to change. My ploy to turn around has been halted by these accusations or memories of the brat I used to be. I know I still am in many ways but as far as possible I'm trying not to be. Ish. Anyway, as usual December brings a host of worries and financial issues, more so with this one. I'm screwed. Everything inside me is turning green as I become just another person to you. All this unnecessary talk and mock around the black hole that is you is making me sick. Sick of feeling anything other than the hatred and anger that is deserved. I am so lost in my own head, in my own thoughts. The only way out is not to get in but I've been stuck here for so long. And now, with no one to trust and no one to talk to. Till today, I am still fucking amazed by the entity of the nothingness I was left with. I had nothing. Absolutely nothing. And after building everything up from scratch, I am still finding holes in the foundation from when you clawed your way through my life. So for that, fuck you.
Explain to me this conspiracy against me
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