I miss my youth. I have the worst case of night feelz and nostalgia. Nostalgia for a better time, a better me and also, some of you. The truth of the truth is that absolutely nobody will ever make me feel as young and or as happy as you did. I'm not in love with you anymore that would be ridiculous, that is simply the way my fucking life is. Looking through old posts and shit because assignments, I find that what I miss or yearn for is not the way I felt and what not, but for the special kind of hope only possessed by those still in the prime of their youth and naivity. And I can see it, positively radiating off our glistening faces, this subtle twinkle in the eyes of kids in love. I can fucking see it on all of our faces, pressed next to each other, making goofy faces to pass the ridiculous amounts of time we spent doing absolutely nothing. I can see it in the pinks of our cheeks, high off wine and love and debauchery. This is too depressing. I am absolutely and have always been, terrified of growing old and losing that. These things happen over time, like a motherfucking ninja. The thing about Life is you don't ever really notice things are changing until they have changed. God damn this is fucking depressing. I have a jonzing for all the times we've had. I know I've made some horrible mistakes in my life, but I wouldn't have had it any other way. Okay, maybe I definitely would have been better to you. But I still wouldn't have changed what I did and how I tried to make it better by giving everything to you, because it really taught me what it truly means to fucking love somebody. I don't want to be old and have no feelings and be fat and gross, somebody please save me ):
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
together, to be
I miss my youth. I have the worst case of night feelz and nostalgia. Nostalgia for a better time, a better me and also, some of you. The truth of the truth is that absolutely nobody will ever make me feel as young and or as happy as you did. I'm not in love with you anymore that would be ridiculous, that is simply the way my fucking life is. Looking through old posts and shit because assignments, I find that what I miss or yearn for is not the way I felt and what not, but for the special kind of hope only possessed by those still in the prime of their youth and naivity. And I can see it, positively radiating off our glistening faces, this subtle twinkle in the eyes of kids in love. I can fucking see it on all of our faces, pressed next to each other, making goofy faces to pass the ridiculous amounts of time we spent doing absolutely nothing. I can see it in the pinks of our cheeks, high off wine and love and debauchery. This is too depressing. I am absolutely and have always been, terrified of growing old and losing that. These things happen over time, like a motherfucking ninja. The thing about Life is you don't ever really notice things are changing until they have changed. God damn this is fucking depressing. I have a jonzing for all the times we've had. I know I've made some horrible mistakes in my life, but I wouldn't have had it any other way. Okay, maybe I definitely would have been better to you. But I still wouldn't have changed what I did and how I tried to make it better by giving everything to you, because it really taught me what it truly means to fucking love somebody. I don't want to be old and have no feelings and be fat and gross, somebody please save me ):
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