+ my fave fucking city

 walking on a dream

I don't like you, I just thought you were cool

Eternally grateful for everything that I have in my life, everything I have seen and experienced and everyone in my life. Hokkaido/Tokyo was nothing short of amazing. Being back in my favourite city in the world again was bittersweet. As much as I fucking love that crazy city life, it definitely wasn't the same without you. Best feeling: watching the light turn green at that Shibuya crossing, and watching that huge mass of people walking towards you with such conviction. LIFE. Let's also talk about Hokkaido though. Summer in Japan is a brilliant myriad of colours and flowers and nature and scenic drives and expressways and getting lost and fresh fruits and singalongs and coastal drives and whiskey distilleries and I could go on forever. Japan will always, always be the best. Anyway, am dreading Monday but truth be told, this weekend isn't as sweet without you around. YUX part two. ANYWAY. My mind has been wandering. I've just been twiddling my toes thinking about how the past is just a story we tell ourselves. I've just been stomping around town weirdly hoping to be seen. I've been thinking, pondering, imagining. Must be the summer time.

I fucking miss you like crazy.

circa two thousand whenever

you don't want me,

you just like the attention

remind me to spend some good time with you

All around a good weekend spent with the boy and with my family. That day at Gardens was the first time in a long time I've seen my grandmother and grandfather so happy.. laughing, smiling at the sights and just being out of the house. Definitely warm memories. Sunday night and I'm almost dreading the coming week. Work has been getting harder. I'm learning to be independent, but yeah it's pretty difficult. I'm determined to be less careless and anxious and terrible, but it's fucking demoralizing sometimes. I mean, it's definitely not all bad. Perhaps I'm just coming off a crappy week. But whatever. I must be better. In other news, the last week has been peppered with.. I can't think of a snarky name for it. Honestly, I've just come to the point where I'm like just do whatever you want, I don't care if you just want to win. I know you never have good intentions but I just don't care anymore because I know I can never win with you. Whatever, it doesn't bother me. It. doesn't. bother. me.