Just a quick one because #christmas. The above depicts a flurry of activities in the +65, generally enjoying our lives and avoiding assignments. Taiwan was an interesting adventure but that's, once again, a story for another day. This year feels much lighter than the last, with the exception of the first couple of days I've been home. I'm sorry I've been acting crazy and over-sensitive and psychotic because I know we have a long way to go and I should really refrain myself from ruining what we have with my psychotic thoughts. Interestingly enough, I spent a good portion of last night flipping through pages from 2007 and came to the realization that I'VE ALWAYS BEEN CRAZY. Apparently, every little thing makes me question people's intentions and I often irrationally believe that the world is against me. Although I'm fucking certain I have a better control over myself now that I'm older, since I know now that not everything revolves around me.. LOL joking. But seriously though. Another thing I've learnt is that apparently, I've always always been obsessed with her #whuuuut #whoknew. But that's besides the point I suppose. Actually no, let's address this for a moment. This year is infinitely different from the last because I am no longer battling demons from my past and am instead, making polite conversations with genuine intentions. Right this instance, Yellow is playing and I am thinking of the time we made the crazy and rash decision to walk a long fucking walk home and feeling absolutely wistful. I've always maintained that I love you and care for you and that will never change, but it's finally stemming from a healthy place now. As for her.. well. She'll always remain an enigma. But back to the main topic, my psychotic-ness. Before I left, I was a real bundle of nerves. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't think, wrecking myself over the thoughts of distances and.. let's face it, infidelity. But when I was there, everything escaped me. Or well, I escaped everything. The negativity couldn't get to me and I finally let go of my anxiety and suspicion because.. whatever the fuck for? Whatever fucking happens happens man, be it me or you or whatever whoever. Right now, all I can think to do is focus on now and myself and what we have, not what we could have or what could happen. Mainly because I couldn't handle it, but also because: whatever the fuck for? #japan2014
Oh Christmas lights, light up the streets
Light up the fireworks in me
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