a game of chase

All sorts of horrible feels which I can only pretend is PMS #life. So many lost nights spent looking out windows, wondering just what exactly happens at night. I'm too comfortable here. The truth is I really want out. It's so clear to me what I know and what I feel, or well, what I don't feel. My life is simply about swinging to the nearest tree. Unfortunately, because I am still psychotic and what not, I'm really way too invested in this shit. I've spent way too long chillin' in the wrong tree. I really hate being this person. I hate being disappointed and expecting things and wanting more and generally not having what I want, exactly the way I want it. I don't really know what I'm saying, I just know that I actually really hate this situation, and actually, always have. This whole thing is an extremely messy train wreck just fucking waiting to happen. There's a time bomb that's waiting to go off, duration unknown. The thing is I want it to explode as badly as I want it to diffuse and just work. This is stupid. There's nothing else to say except that this is stupid.


Players only love you 
when they're playing