Monday, February 27, 2012

I'd drive straight off the edge

So many things are always happening yet none seem to matter that much. Shall we start with the current one? I say current because to me you are as fleeting and as trivial in my life as a wave crashing upon the shore. It is becoming painfully obvious to me that the only impact you will ever leave on my life came and went years ago, and only because it wasn't about you at all. When will you learn that this is Life: if you're lucky you get as much as you give, never more and almost always less. Unless of course you're one of the lucky ones and sweet baby jesus, trust me when I say that you most definitely are not. (I'm sure your mother says otherwise) I am not being harsh, I am merely being honest. If you were so special you wouldn't be so insecure of yourself and so fucking jealous of every single person around you. I just want to sick around long enough to see if it is even possible for you to hold down another relationship. I've put the gun to your head months ago and now I have it cocked and fully loaded and you are daring me to shoot it. Motherfucker. Moving on (soon enough), this weekend I found myself sitting at the top of the city and coming to the realization that I still have a lot of unresolved issues. I think you're just messing with me by now. It's been too long for it to matter.. and yet. I want nothing more than to be younger and wiser. Or better yet, never to have had anything real before because now that I know how it feels, it's too difficult to live otherwise. I think we all know what I mean.


restore life the way it should be

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